Sorry, this will be a screwed up entry. I've got so much going on in my head I can't concentrate on any one subject.
I've been real emotional the last few days, crying at sad things, happy things, nothings. I had to pull off of the road this morning for a good cry. Driving along, a thought jumps into my head. "Ya know, 2 1/2 yrs. full time, things are going real good with this transition. OMG! What if I really am trans?" (ya know, they really need to come up with a definitive test for this) We all look for an explanation as to why we are like we are, even "normal" people. A definite, YES YOU ARE would help me a lot.
I've got umpteen things that need to be done around here and no will to do them. I can't get the trans voice in my head to shut-up long enough to allow me to do them. ...."All trans, all the time!" ... It's a wonder I don't go crazy.
Sex. Sex with a man. Sex with a woman. Sex, sex, sex. I can't stop thinking about sex. I thought these pills were suppose to stop that. .....Hmmm, the satellite dish man comes tomorrow. I'll paint my face early and wear my tight jeans. I'll be ready...
Diet. At work Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday I lose 5 pounds. Off on Friday and Saturday I gain it back. I need a weekend job.
I heard a joke while I was at the bar Sat. Your riding a horse, a giraffe beside you. You look behind you and see a lion about to eat you, the horse, and the giraffe. What do you do? ....You get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round!
I'll go now. I'll make a better reader than a writer tonight.