Well, I won't start a list of the numerous things that ARE wrong with me, I'd never be able to finish the list. I don't think I'll live THAT long. Tonight I'll just pick one of the many that I don't understand the whys, because ofs, and how to fix it, or, if it even needs fixed.
I don't know why I do it, but when I talk with someone, either one-on-one or in a small group, I find myself mentally backing away from the group, person, situation, and wondering what it looks like, what I look like, from a distance. I've even had dreams where I sit in the shadows, watching myself, watch myself. And it isn't about the way I look, it's more like I'm watching to see if I make a mistake, a blunder. I guess that's the perfectionist in me, I hate making a mistake. I'll even not attempt something rather than to try and fail. This certainly can't be good, and I bet that a good therapist could tell me why I do it. Too bad I don't have one. (I'm working on a remedy for that.)
So all you Lucy's out there with your sidewalk booths set up for 5 cent psychiatry, diagnose my problem. You certainly will give just as good of advise as any of the many high priced shrinks that I've seen. I've never been pleased with any of them. At least you know what it's like to be transgender!